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I’ve made no secret of the fact that my cheekily named fatty-to-fitty posts were all pretty old. Even the goal post is from a year ago now. Which kind of begs the question: where am I at now? That answer is a little complicated.

For awhile I maintained my little body, and I loved it. The numbers in my clothes made me feel good about myself, which is probably not the healthiest thing when you think about it. But still, I refuse to lie, and seeing that 4 in the back of my jeans made my day just about every time I put them on. And for a long time, I stayed right there.

Now? Not so much.

I’ve gained some weight. Not muscle mind you. Nope! Jiggly bits of returned fat. giphy001

I was NOT pleased. But there is no one else to blame. No one force feeds me. I know what my body needs and what it takes to keep my figure trim. There was nothing but malice in my neglect of these facts. Sad, but true. I self sabotaged all over the place.

That got old quickly, however. Something had to change. I don’t hate myself, so why am I behaving as though I do? It didn’t take me long to realize I was unhappy with several things in my life. My job being a big one of them. So I quit. I knew it wasn’t where God wanted me and I knew it was negatively impacting my life in numerous ways. Now I’m on this grand adventure called Chasing Faeries and couldn’t be happier (most days anyway.) Which meant it was time to get my body back under control.

Funnily enough, once I was happy and walking my best possible path again, the weight just kind of fell off. I didn’t really consciously change anything. I kept eating my normal foods, I just didn’t require as much of them to feel satisfied anymore. Kinda crazy how that works out, huh?

But I wasn’t satisfied. Yeah, my body is healthy and fits in my favorite clothes, but that was not my main goal. Health was WAY up there and so were the clothes, but what I really wanted was to see in the mirror what I see in my mind’s eye. She had yet to materialize.

In comes exercise. Turns out I really can’t quite get the body I want without it. Go figure. Lol. Still, I’m not the biggest fan of group fitness classes and I know I won’t push myself worth shit. Which really just leaves the option of personal training. Even that will only work out if I get just the right trainer. I have an appointment with one, and by the time you read this, we will have had our first session. I’ll let you all know how it goes.

Until then,

~me💋

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