Why am I even trying? I ask myself that more often than I would care to acknowledge. Still, I keep at it. When the blog malfunctions, when my Twitter followers dwindle, when I stare at the screen for hours, paralyzed with fear and unable to get anything of value accomplished. Even then, I keep going. Why? Because it would be sinful for me not to.
I have been given a very specific task and set of skills to accomplish that, we all have. God calls them our gifts. Then he provides us with a task, often referred to as our calling, and makes sure it’s something beyond our reach. That way we’re sure to bring him along on the journey and give credit where credit is due. Keeps us humble, and to a certain degree wise.
Many people search and search for their calling. I don’t think it’s as hard to find as we make it out to be, personally anyway. If you’ll just slow down and listen, stop striving for a little bit and hear God’s voice on this, then you’ll probably figure it out pretty easy. It also REALLY helps to not lie to yourself. Lots of us figure out our calling and then deny it. Why? Because your calling is guaranteed to scare the hell out of you. It’s designed to be intimidating to you, among many other things. This is where that whole bit about reliance on God comes in, but if you lack the faith for that, you simply play dumb. You lie to yourself and sometimes to others. Hiding your head in the sand seems a lot easier and safer than pursuing that.
This is why we keep going. Why we keep praying and modifying tactics. Learning all we can. It’s what I was made to do, and I know that. Rose has found her place at my side, providing all she can in her own areas of strength. Sharing her unique talents. We alone are not enough to get the job done. The job of helping people move closer to Christ, of getting nonbelievers to a place of better understanding of what it really mean to follow Jesus, of building an empire that honors him and treats it’s employees the way he would want them to be treated. It’s an ENORMOUS undertaking, with an incredible amount of moving parts and steps to be taken. I cannot do this. Rose cannot do this. Only God can do this. And that is why we keep going.
Until next time, darlings…